All right, we're checking out the only game
where the cost of a cup of coffee is your soul. It's Coffee Stack. Imagine you're in your favorite coffee
shop, and the thing that's getting you your coffee is just like
a disembodied floating hand. There's actually, like, a back to this hand, too. I don't know- Oh, the- the lids just get
smashed on there. What is this? Is that giving me sleeves for free? I'm not giving away any coffee for free. I didn't know that was part of this game. So obviously you have to give the coffee
to as many humans- Well, I hope they're human hand- as possible so that you can get gigantic amounts of tips.
Design your cafe. I love how I can't even buy a cash
register, I guess. I'll get a couch that seems more important
than making money. We couldn't afford a cash register,
but we could afford, like, an 18 foot long cup of coffee
chilling out in the ceiling.
I will say at least we have a plant.
So that's good. Sell.
Sell what? Like, sell them all. Or do I just get, like,
a bunch of extra money for that? Where does the money go? I feel like it's
I feel like it's not going back to me. Is this giving me a new type of coffee? Oh, I've upgraded into,
like, berry lattes.
We're not giving away free coffee anymore. Don't you try and, like, creepily
try to fondle my coffee. That looks like what's happening here. So you start out with not much.
Coffee, something. What'd that say, like Coffee God? Coffee sad. Oh, wow this get's really tall.. I can unlock a barista.
I didn't have one before. Well, I guess all-
The only thing I had before was just your hand. All right, let me put my extra coffees in this spot over here
to unlock the actual coffee making area.
Real quick, do you get to design
your own logo? Oh, God. One hour later, everyone
probably wondering what this is. This is obviously a man
getting eaten alive by an iguana. I love it. We're open for business. Does it really sit there? Oh, God, it does.
It's glorious! What else can I buy here? Oh, it's just more tables. Okay, so starting off with the cups,
filling them up with delicious death, switching over to the very.
This is one of my favorite flavors,
the diabetes special. And then don't go to sell it back
over to an even better one. Sleeve up as many as I can. And that's going to be big money. Oh, yeah. I even have
a bunch of drinks just left over. I don't know where they're going. They're like commiserating with all
the different calorie induced desserts. I love that it's espresso or nothing. Like there's no other options for you. You get your espresso
and you just have to deal with it. Wow. They're really reaching
for free coffee these days. I love how ridiculous the stack gets too.
How far can you upgrade these? Like, all that's happening is they're putting more
and more caramel inside of my drinks. So as many-
Oh, no! Ahhh!!!
Some of my drinks almost got severed by the battle ax of anti caffeine. 50%. 50%, what?
Like 50% coffee? Oh, I'm I'm literally leaking coffee. So and I get a little bit
here. I'm up to 60%. I try and not get smashed.
I'm assuming basically what's happening
as I'm trying to get to like 100% coffee powers, like coffee
powers activate. They're trying to suck my coffee up.
So this is gambling, huh? Right. Is this gamble going to pay off?
Oh, the gambling totally paid off. Annnnd, uh, I'll take the minus, like, half, I guess.
Right. What is the color scheme of coffee
mean tap. I have to. get my 37% coffee, the other of whatever
63% is filled by tears. Okay, I want as many upgrades
to my coffee as possible. We need more upgrading.
Watch out for the battle ax. The battle ax, well just- petty much just battled me real good.
There's no- There wasn't really much I could do about it.
Oh, yeah, we're going. We're getting a secondary upgrade here. Hold on. So for some caramels,
the farthest you can possibly get, I'm assuming that's what that is. I can't honestly be sure.
We should get a ton of money for this. So it's $220 in coffee, which in Starbucks
amounts is basically like three cups and we're going past boss to coffee,
whatever that is. How did we get a different hand? That's how you upgrade in this game:
More fondly hands. Yeah. All right, let's do it. What do we got inside the tip
box nowadays? 500. I'm in a cell this time
just to see what it does. I don't know if it's better
than the upgrades or what. Like the money goes away. I don't really know
what happens to the money. I do have my better hand now,
so that could mean something as well. Keep selling all these. Okay, I have nothing to lid at this point.
I'm like, just a sorry hand. All that all that's doing
is basically abusing my own hand. I feel like the sell is just not good enough. We'll find out in a second. Don't
any of you touch me? I'm not holding coffee. There's nothing here for you.
Intern. Never selling the coffee again. I've got to continue to be a coffee God. Welcome to the Cannibalistic Iguana Cafe. That's basically
what we are at this point. Don't ever sell your coffee. Also, I'm pretty sure my coffee
got upgraded even more. Yeah, it did. Look at that. We're doing,
like, fancy foam now.
French press. Okay. And then we're getting the triple upgrade
over here to the lid's Nice.
To the sleeves. Okay, that's $230 worth of sold coffee with a bunch left over
for all the different muffins and stuff. Okay, we're getting past Coffee God now. Alright fresh French press. The only cost is your soul. Don't worry. You weren't using it
anyway. Come on now. Grab all the cups. More French press. Watch out for the abusive
like death stamp over there. Get as many of these upgrades as you can
because upgrades are worth like a ton. I don't know why you pay more for coffee
if it's lidded than if it's unlidded.
To 39. Okay. So that's a new best record. All the highest tips, all the best candies and we're another step past Coffee God. I actually kind of
want to know what comes next. Like Coffee Lord. Coffee king. God, I love our emblem.
So does everyone else to look at them. Come in over here. I guess I'll get some more tables There we go. Oh, yeah. This place is going to be packed. People come into this coffee shop will be
like, Oh, what flavor did you get there? Friends will be like
the blood of the innocent.
I love that you don't even need coffee
to somehow get the upgrade. I'm not really sure how that happens. It just like upgrades nothing. It's just the idea that maybe one day
you could have a coffee. I got to get these coffees back.
I got some lids out of the deal. I guess not everyone needs them. All right. That's
a pretty weak amount of coffee. Although at this point,
my coffee is literally like flying away. It actually has wings. It may even be a living creature.
I'm looking for big money. I kind of wonder what comes after the French press, too,
if it's eventually just like jet fuel. I think that that's that's
what ends up happening to the coffee. Please don't do it. I hate you so much. That's alright, I can get most of this back.
And we're going to lid almost all of the coffees.
Which is then going to get followed up by some big upgrades Got to watch out for the
the random death spikes that are there to ruin the caffenation that we're
distributing to the rest of the world. I love how there's
literally just a live cow spewing milk into the coffee at this point. Where did this cow come from? I mean, they look happy
with their job, I guess. I guess we're paying them
an excellent wage. I have no idea. So continue to upgrade and I can
either do lids or more upgrading. Oh, I've got most of my things
already upgraded like way upgraded, so I don't really have to worry
about any further upgrades. I have to remember that. All right. Get ready, because wherever the coffee gods live,
I don't know, like Mount Olympus or something, they have bestowed for us
even better coffee. So right now, no upgrades. We're actually going over hills
at this point, so now steamers. Okay, I don't want to get the sell.
More steamers over here. Big upgrades. Can I upgrade it even further? Oh, you can upgrade even further.
So $266 of sold coffee on top of all of the bonuses gets us way
past Coffee God now. And I get an even more gropey hand.
Bbehold my new hand. What? What is that? Oh, wow. There's even more people
looking for free coffee. How dare you? I'm
going to find you and I'm gonna do unholy, caffeinated things to you. All right, more steamer. Get a couple lids. I mostly want the upgrades,
though. The upgrades That looks like an unbelievable amount
of sucralose or whatever. Who am I kidding? We're not using any fake sugar here. Everyone gets to experience
the full fattening concepts behind Cannibalistic Iguana Coffee Okay… Oh, I got, like, an extra $2.
I don't know how. Oh, yeah, I'm just. I'm. I don't know. I'm just here. Go crazy and try and get as many different
things as possible. All right. So there is a lot of battle axes around. I can still get most of this.
$149.
Considering everything I had to go through to get to this point. I do have a lot of extra coffees too
that'll bring in some extra cash. Should get us at least to master. You know what? What brings you back words? Okay, that's actually really good to know. We might want to use that
from time to time. So now there's like. Now there's like a beaty press over here. I don't even know what to call this. Stop trying to take my coffee for free. Stop it. Go away. Okay, doubling up on on sleevesand upgrades.
Big upgrades! $272!!! and tons of fat to destroy all the blood Back on the path
to espresso based enlightenment. I'm here to make coffee,
and I mean, that's really all I do.
I guess I accept tips as well, If I can get them.
Watch out for the 50% theft machine over there. The gigantic-
I love the gigantic straw. It's just this random straw. I don't need the question
marks at this point. Oh, we're going to be big this time. It stopped us at, like 31% because you got
hit last time with like a divide by two. But this time, we're already
at 80% of a cup of coffee. In fact, it's going to get filled up. Oh, it adds on to the 37%. So what happens with the overflow? Does it just end up scalding some poor child or something? Oh, I get a better cup. And $2,000.
Okay. New cup of coffee? Sure. Why not? All right. Getting pretty stacked.
I like it. And then add some milk. Watch out for the free person over there. They did get a coffee. Adamant. There wasn't too much I could do about it,
to be quite honest with you. So the lids are worth $2 each. Oh, no….
Hold on. Oh, you got to be kidding me.
It's like trying to drive
through a Nissan commercial. There's just so much violence
that happens, trying to sell coffee. I got a crap ton of money. So we're going to spend it now. More capacity, more capacity,
faster baristas, more capa- Give me all the upgrades. How does she carry
that many cups of coffee? It doesn't matter. They're literally stacked to the sky. Look at the giant money
that just sits on the ground. Oh, I got a plant. I got all the plants now. I guess we were just drinking
coffee in the dark. Let the caffeine guide you, my son. All right. Get the cups. And then remember,
we can use the the reverse. It doesn't look like it does.
I mean, I've trusted it so far and milk for everyone
with a ton of lids into an upgrade. Also that was gold. I don't really know what the-
Are my cups now bejeweled? I have been jeweled coffee cups
at this point I love that I love that the coffee just comes out of a box.
Like no one actually makes it.
It's just prepackaged that way. So now we've upgraded to some artwork, you know, probably stolen
from Google Images or whatever. Two people are ordering
seven cups of coffee. That's what I like to see. I have upgraded to
an even more impressive shop where we sell even more sugar. I bought that before
I actually even paid for the coffee area. I'm never upgrading my logo. It's the only logo I will ever need. I've had so much money
just stacked over here. Okay, so now it's like the Medieval Times
banner trying to violate me. I don't even know what that means. It's like driving
through the expressway over here. Okay, we got the golden coffee. That's good. Coffee just got upgraded. We now have kitten coffee. All right, these people over here
want two coffee and two donuts. We don't sell anything
healthy at the shop, so you just have to kind of take
what you can get. I love how I just put the donuts, like,
right on top of the coffee.
It doesn't even matter. I'm like a professional juggler
when it comes to coffee and donuts. My shop just got updated. Incoming jungle. I love how like the violators
just get more and more violent. It's now two levels of stabbers. No, nothing in life
is for free. Get over it. Okay. We've got the golden cup of coffee. I just don't want to lose it. All right. Still there?
I think it's upgraded now. I don't even know. It's definitely in the middle
there somewhere. I think my coffee has tails on it now. Like, I mean, like a wagging tail. I love how they're not even
eating the donuts. Like they're just metaphysically
absorbing them somehow. How are you doing
there? My sugary amoebas. I want to get to the next level. Give me your milk.
Oh, there is so much espresso
going out over here. Give me all your steamers, too. Upgrades!!!!
More upgrad- Oh, I, like, got reversed.
That's pretty cool. And I'm getting big legs out of the deal
to almost got my very first like full 300 there
look at how much extra coffee there is. I'm, like, running out of space
to put it all. Oh, yeah. Okay. New personal best
almost to the next level. Wow. The golden coffee
right off the bat tastes like- I dunno, probably tastes like having to go to the dentist.
Because I'm not really sure what drinking gold would do to your teeth.
Through all the steamers. Looking good.
Big roll over to the side,
into the upgrader. Bunch of sleeves, bunch of lids. We're going to do the even further upgrade
and then a couple of extra lids. $286. It's crazy that I have to like
rely on so many different tactics in order to sell coffee. I feel like this is some Sun
Tzu level stuff over here. Okay, new coffee upgrade. Now they're wearing like diamond crowns. That has to be worth something big. I love that one of the things you can
land on is just like a punch to the face. Okay, at least I got the money. All right, Gimme my crown. We're halfway there. The only thing that more like expensive
coffee means is that you get more and more diabetes,
and that's really all there is to it. So we're going to get to see
the next level of upgrade. Okay. Yeah, the gold is starting
to pile on to our coffee. Oh, yeah. This is the big run. More jewelry. More jewelry on all the coffee.
What does it mean? I don't know if it makes it taste better or what.
What? I love that at this point, it, like,
legitimately looks like my coffee is going to a wedding. Like, it's
actually the bride. Even just the second level
now is just filled with gold and power. Why? I have no clue. I love that. I'm at the point
now where my where my coffee is upgrading into mythical creatures
like you'll see at the end here my coffee actually upgrades into it's
just upgrades into unicorns. I don't even know what it means. And look, it's just unicorns. Unicorns with golden unicorn horns.
Ahhhhh!!!! I'm actually called the Coffee Lord now. That's what happens
when you get full upgrades I'm getting tipped $2,000.
I thought I just became a billionaire
selling coffee. That's great. Until next time: Stay foxy and much love..
